I don’t know what it is about Sundays, but I always feel depressed on Sundays.
I never want to get out of bed, and even when I do, I feel so lazy and out of it. I hardly ever am productive and I really dislike it. A few reasons why I think Sundays are so hard for me:
– I (sometimes) go to a huge church where I’m a nobody. In some ways, I like it… I like the anonymity of it… sitting by myself and listening to God without having to listen to friends chatter back and forth during the service. Being able to focus on Him the whole drive there and back and really pouring out my heart in that time alone. But some Sunday mornings, like today, I just don’t want to get out of bed and go to be alone in that big place. Some Sundays, I don’t want to blend into the crowd… I want to go to a place where people know me and want to get to know me. I want to be recognized and waved at and sat with at church. And that doesn’t happen currently.
– I never have any plans. Other than church, Sundays are usually a lazy day for me. I clean my room, make to-do lists for the week, plan meals and my budget, do a jigsaw puzzle, bake something pumpkin, etc. I’m practically a 22-year old grandma. I love having that lazy time on Sundays, but sometimes I want to get out and do something. Go somewhere. See something new. Be with people. When I know I have no plans for the day other than the usual, it makes me want to simply sit in bed all day reading or watching Netflix. No plans = lazy Meredith.
– It signals a new week is starting. Don’t get me wrong I love weekends and I love Mondays (most of the time), but I don’t like all the stressors that a new work week bring. I don’t like the anticipation of my ginormous to-do lists for work. I don’t like knowing that another 5 days lie between me and another weekend. Some weeks, work gets the best of me, and I live for the weekends.
– I’m alone. Ok, that’s not 100% true… I have my family and the dogs, but sometimes I just want to curl up on the couch and cuddle with a significant other and watch football games or old movies. A girl can dream, right? It’s hard to do that when you live at home and are single. Also on this “alone” note, none of my friends ever want to hang out on Sundays. Friday nights and Saturday mornings they might be game, but Sundays it seems everyone else is just as lazy and lame as I am.
Slow Sundays like today, I feel depressed. My brother is off to lunch and play video games with his friends, my parents are out to lunch and running errands, and here I am at home with my laptop, bottle of water, and bar of dark chocolate. Alone. Feeling sorry for myself. Ugh. I hate this.
How does one get rid of this feeling and this laziness? How does one not feel so low, so depressed on Sundays?