Do you ever compare yourself to someone else?
Honestly y’all, I do this a lot. I know it is so bad and I try so hard not to, but truth is, it’s just something I’ve always done and habits are hard to kick!
Whether it’s comparing myself physically, intellectually, spiritually, emotionally, financially, athletically, etc., I compare myself to others.
Thinking maybe that “oh they are prettier than I am” or “they are more charming than me” or maybe even “they are a better person; why would anyone want to be my friend if they have them?” And then there’s the ever-popular, “they are so much smarter than me, how could I ever have anything in common with them?!”
There are some of my friends who are the perfect friend to other people. They make me question myself with- “why would anyone want to be my friend when they have him/her as a friend? How could I ever be as good of a person & friend as he/she is?” Some of my friends are just plain awesome and have so many other friends that I get to thinking, “why are they even my friend? I am not nearly as cool as (insert name).” Truth is, I HATE these comparisons. But being a young adult with not so many friends, I am constantly evaluating my friendships and friends and sometimes I simply question myself and my amiability.
Then there’s the oh so famous comparison of, “she’s prettier than me. Her outfit is cuter. All the guys like her.” This is my least favorite. I really hate comparing myself physically to other females but it happens a lot. Not trying to make myself appear to have low self-esteem, but some days I throw an outfit together, rub some makeup on my face, and head out the door. (Ok, so my morning routine isn’t quite as rushed or as barbarian as it sounds, but I never look like someone who stepped off the runway. Especially at 6 in the morning.) I pass soooo many people while walking around UNC’s campus, and on the outside I smile and say “hi” but underneath, I’m comparing myself to them… hair, makeup, clothes, shoes.
Growing up I was always surrounded by church family, friends, and I even went to a Christian college. Don’t get me wrong, I have loved that aspect of my life, but it has gotten annoying. These are the worst comparisons ever but let’s be honest- it happens. “They are more spiritual than I am. They are a better Christian. They worship better. They have better spiritual gifts…etc” I have thought quite a few of these things myself in the past. And it’s hard to get over those thoughts and focus not on other people’s relationship with God, but your own. Sometimes it’s hard seeing people flaunt their Christianity/spirituality in your face, and that’s what usually sparks those comparisons in me. So instead of comparing, I try to focus on myself and Him. And then I go get in a deep theological debate 😉 [totally kidding on that last part!]
Galatians 6:4-5 “Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else, for each one should carry their own load.”
Being a recent college graduate, people are still asking what my major was. (Didn’t you get the graduation announcement??? Duh… :p ) Then they’ll ask me a little about what I studied. (Linguistics & Spanish for those of you not on my mailing list) When I start talking about morphemes and phonemes and graphemes of world languages, I feel smart. Until they start reciting Pi and listing the major global diseases and possible solutions. Ok, again, just kidding with all of that. I have never had anyone recite Pi to me. Nor have I talked about morphemes, phonemes, or graphemes outside of school. But, I have had someone broadcast their grades from their difficult advanced Chemistry class, boast that they read hieroglyphics better than an Egyptian, and divulge too much information about the difficulties of applying to medical school. Umm ok… now I’m starting to feel dumb. How can my language background compare to a medical genius, or a university educator, a business tycoon, or even a psychologist?! Here comes the comparison- “they are so much smarter than me. How could I ever be their friend? What could we possibly talk about?”
I’ve just admitted something rather intimate about myself. Online. And I’m going to tweet a link. What am I thinking?! Really though y’all, I just had to get some of that off my chest. It’s been bothering me a lot lately just how much I compare myself. Comparisons are on my mind daily, and I promise I am working on it. But it’s a work in progress 🙂
Do you ever compare yourself to someone else?